Sunday, July 16, 2017

Fears

Today as we were getting ready for church, McKay began talking to me about how he's unhappy in his life. He said he just doesn't feel happy each day. After some delicate probing I discovered he is worried about auditioning for the musical Willy Wonka. Initially he told me he wanted to audition so when the director approached me about being the musical director for the show I agreed, thinking it would be a wonderful way to have a theatrical experience with McKay.

Then, the day after I officially accepted the position, McKay told me he was frightened of the audition, so much so that he no longer wanted to do it. I told him he had to. Apparently ever since he's been worrying.

I did my best to listen sympathetically while also trying to get everyone including myself ready and out the door on time to church.

I told McKay that since auditions aren't until the end of October and it's only July that he shouldn't think about it for at least a month, but he persisted.

He talked and talked, complained and cried all the way out the door and into the van. The others had gone to church earlier, so it was just McKay, Lily and I in the van together. As we drove toward the church, McKay continued. Just as he was reaching the height of his oration saying, "And the thing I'm very most afraid of is..."

Lily, who had to this point been listening quietly piped up and cheerfully replied, "Bears?"


Saturday, April 15, 2017

Lamb of God Performance

Tonight BJ and I performed with the Southwest Symphony, the Lieto Voices Choir, and 8 amazing soloists in a tour-de-force production of Lamb of God at the Cox Performance Center at DSU, filled to near capacity. It was one of the most powerful musical and spiritual experiences I have ever had and, though it is SO late, I must write a few of my feelings, knowing that the words I write will not begin to express the feelings I've felt tonight.

My role tonight was Martha, who sings "Make Me Whole" a piece begging the Savior to heal her and help her in dealing with the despair she faces after thinking her brother Lazarus is dead. It is a beautiful, powerful, achingly sorrowful yet hope-filled piece of music.

Even as I rehearsed it, I would be brought to tears as I contemplated the plight of Martha. A woman, in that time needed a protector. Without a husband, Martha looked to Lazarus not only as her brother but as her protector and provider. For her, losing him meant losing everything.

And yet, Martha's song is both a plea to the Savior for his help and also a statement of faith, that though she doesn't know how, she knows the Savior can make her whole.

I have approached this performance with a fair amount of nerves. We performed from memory and with only a few rehearsals with the symphony. Facing the concert tonight, I had only sung my part 3 times with the orchestra which was a bit frightening. With a piano accompanist you can make mistakes and know the accompanist will follow but with the machine that is a symphony, if a soloist messes up, the ship is sunk.

However, as I mentally prepared and prayed about tonight's performance, I prayed for peace and the ability to overcome any worry or fear and to truly tell Martha's story with my whole soul. I wanted to lay everything I have to give on the alter tonight. To share my soul, my faith, my testimony of Jesus Christ and all the times he has made me whole.

As I sat, staring out into the packed house tonight, instead of feeling fear, I felt gratitude and love and a responsibility to share in the best, most complete way, the message of hope and faith. As I stood and sang, I felt deeply. I could feel her sorrow and grief at the loss of her brother. I could feel her desperation and her plea to the Savior and MY pleas and desperation and hope in Christ. As I sang I was overcome with such a powerful feeling of being a witness of the Savior. Tonight I sang my witness, my testimony and my soul. And when I sat down, the Holy Ghost witnessed Divine approval.

Afterward many people said beautiful things to me, but the term several people used was "perfect". Certainly I am not perfect but I believe that opening of the soul and giving everything I could possibly give allowed Martha to come to life and her message to be shared in a way that deeply touched others.

I am SO grateful for these amazing, rare, precious opportunities! I'm grateful for the health and strength to sing and testify. I'm humbled at the opportunities and the power of spirit that I have felt as I sang tonight.

Lamb of God is an inspired piece and tonight I felt each soloist giving their very best gifts tonight. The stage was a sacred place tonight and each gave their offering. I believe all were accepted tonight.

Sunday, April 9, 2017

McKay's Prayer

On Saturday night BJ, Dad, and I had our final concert of the season for St George Chamber Singers. It went really well, I think our best yet!

The boys are finally getting old enough to attend events like this, so we gave them the choice of staying home with a babysitter or coming to the concert with Nana. They chose to attend and afterward we all went and got frozen yogurt together. It was so much fun to spend the time together! I could see them from the stage while we were singing and I was so pleased to see them sitting very quietly!

After all the fun we headed back home and got ready for bed. McKay offered the family prayer and in it he thanked Heavenly Father for Mom and her "beautiful voice". For a kid who spent his early years covering his ears and shouting, "Stop practicing!!" every time I began to even hum, this was a HUGE deal! I was so touched! Perhaps there's hope of him liking music after all!

In the same prayer he also thanked Heavenly Father for Dad because he "always helps us with things like homework and spelling". I could see BJ's face light up and, I think, a tear come to his eye. He loves his boys so much. I think he felt so happy to hear McKay recognize the love and support given so often.

Also, I have to say, Kate is the CUTEST thing ever! She still hardly talks but is absolutely charming! She loves to walk and does this cute little strut where she swings her arms really big as her tiny legs walk along. It's adorable! She loves to jump on the trampoline here at grandma's house and bounces really high! She also loves to name the people she loves. At least twice a day she goes through her list: Papa, Nana, Daddy, EE-ee (Lily), and Bama (Grandma Cox).

Sunday, February 26, 2017

Thoughts on prayer from church today

During Sacrament meeting our high counsel speaker Brother Lunt (also the doctor who delivered Lily and Kate) stated that he sometimes prays and says what he thinks he should say, not what is truly in his heart. His point is that God already knows us and knows our hearts, the work of prayer is to align our will to God's and to commune with him.

His statement rang true with me. I often approach the Lord with some pretenses, not as a close friend. While there needs to be respect for the God of the universe, ultimately the title he chooses is "Heavenly Father" which suggests he wants us to come to him in that relationship.

I want to become more sincere in my prayers. That is when they will become meaningful and powerful. "Prayer is the soul's sincere desire", the hymn reminds us. I must try to be more honest with the Lord and therefore more sincere in my prayers.

Last week when I was preparing to speak in church, I had a very difficult time! Usually I enjoy preparing talks and lessons but this instance was totally difference. Our topic was incredibly brief and either extremely narrow or incredibly huge and I just felt overwhelmed.

Plus, it was one of the craziest weeks ever! Mary Kreider and her family were in town house-hunting and needed assistance. Becky and her kids came to visit. I was teaching and going to Brigadoon rehearsals, taking care of the kids, and prepping for a Let's Play Music certification video review.

By the time 10pm Sat night rolled around, I still didn't have any idea what I should say in my 15 min talk the next day.

I had been thinking and studying, but I had nothing. My prayer for help to the Lord was certainly sincere, but still nothing came. Not one experience, not one scripture. Finally, in true humility I approached the Lord, realizing that I needed to repent. I had been neglecting scripture study and sincere prayer. Life had been washing over me in such powerful waves I had struggled to keep my head above water and had let go of my lifeline.

After recognizing my neglect and asking for forgiveness and in true humility for help, the ideas began to flow. It was as if a light turned on inside my mind and heart. I not only thought of experiences but received personal revelation to synthesize those experiences and realize the clear blessings the Lord had given me through those experiences.

The process was a powerful lesson to me of unlocking the blessings of the Lord through humble, sincere, prayer.

Sunday, February 19, 2017

Principles and Promises Talk

Principles and Promises Talk 2/19/2017

Family Introduction
My name is Rachel Cox and we are part of the small group that was recently annexed into your ward. My husband BJ and I are both from St George. We met at Pine View High School where we played opposite each other in the HS musical “Carousel”. We became great friends through the course of the show. He was actually my first kiss, which was a stage kiss, in rehearsal under the watchful eye of our director.

I distinctly remember on the closing night of the show after the scene where we kissed thinking, “I’ll probably never kiss BJ Cox again.” Which, surprisingly, made me sad.  That sadness confused me, surprised me, and prompted me to ask him to Preference.

During HS we performed together in musicals and with the HS choirs. After high school BJ served a mission in Uruguay and I attended DSU and then BYU where I pursued a bachelors and then master’s in vocal performance. After BJ’s mission we were married and both studied at BYU and sang and toured together in the BYU Singers and in the opera program at BYU.

We then moved to Lexington KY where BJ attended dental school. I directed a collegiate women’s chorus and taught voice lessons and we began our family. We have 4 beautiful children, McKay, 8, Benson 6, Lily 4, and Kate, almost 2.  They are the joy of our lives and we absolutely adore each one!

After dental school we were able to purchase a dental practice here in St George and were delighted to move home. Since moving back to St George we have had some fun musical opportunities including helping to found the St George Chamber Singers and play opposite each other again in Into the Woods.

As you can see, singing is an important part of our lives. It brings us joy and feeds our souls. I can honestly say that some of the most powerful spiritual experiences of my life have occurred while I was singing. It is one of the ways the holy ghost speaks to me.

I love to teach voice lessons, and as a voice teacher I want my students to love singing, but I also want them to learn to sing correctly and healthily. In order to do so, it is important that they learn correct principles of singing. For example, one of the most basic principles of healthy singing is breathing deeply. The sternum must be lifted and diaphragm must lower, allowing for full expansion of the lungs. This proper inhalation sets up the singer to sing a phrase correctly and beautifully. Principles of healthy singing such as deep breathing, proper posture, jaw, tongue and laryngeal position allow a singer to produce beautiful sounds.

Both earth and heaven are filled with principles which, if followed, will yield certain, specific results.

A principle is defined as a basic truth :a law or fact of nature that explains how something works or why something happens.

Certain principles apply universally to all. For example, if you want to improve at something, whether it’s singing or sports, painting or poetry, you must practice it.

The voice students who are the most successful are the ones who learn a principle correctly and apply it to their singing repeatedly. They practice a true principle until it becomes a part of them. And their singing always improves as a result.

D & C 130 20-21 states,
20 There is a law, irrevocably decreed in heaven before the foundations of this world, upon which all blessings are predicated—
21 And when we obtain any blessing from God, it is by obedience to that law upon which it is predicated.
So here we learn that blessings from God are the result of our “practicing” or applying a true gospel principle.
The 4th article of faith states that the first principle of the gospel is Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.
During October 2016 General Conference Elder Hales taught us, “Our children and grandchildren are our most important investigators.” So in our home we have been working on the principle of faith, helping to build faith and resulting testimony in the hearts of our children. Some children seem to be born with believing hearts and others seem to have to work to gain faith and a testimony of the gospel. In our family, we have some of each.
As a family and as a couple we have been praying for experiences that would build faith. We have been studying Alma 32 as a family, discussing the principle of faith and Alma’s invitation to try an experiment on the word of God. As parents, we have sought opportunities to help build faith in the hearts of our little ones. One such opportunity came during the Christmas season this year as our family participated in the “Light the World initiative.
On Christmas Eve the “Light the World” example was “Jesus cared for his loved ones and so can you.” Though Christmas Eve was a busy day, I felt that the way we should ‘care for those we love” was  to take the kids and pay a surprise visit to my grandparents, age 90, who live in town. So, the kids and I loaded in the car with a few small gifts and off we went to visit Grandpa and Grandma.
We arrived and rang the doorbell. When the door opened we sang, “We wish you a Merry Christmas” and presented our gifts. Grandpa and Grandma, who were in their pajamas eating a lunch of frozen dinners, sitting next to their small table-top Christmas tree seemed overjoyed to have some visitors on this Christmas Eve. They welcomed us warmly, showed the kids their rock and arrowhead collections, books about gem stones and dream catcher collection, all of which the kids found fascinating. They sang a Christmas carol with us and through some tears Grandma said, “you just made our whole Christmas”! It was wonderful and humbling to see what a difference a few minutes could make.
After the kids and I loaded back in the car from the back seat McKay said, “Mom, I’m really glad we visited grandpa and grandma today. That felt SO good!
I felt and realized this was an opportunity and answer to my prayers to be able to help McKay realize that he was feeling the Holy Ghost and feeling the Lord’s approval for his love and service to someone else.
This experience strengthened the faith and testimonies of each member of our family and confirmed to me that as we sought for faith and opportunities to build it in our family, we were given the promised blessing of having the opportunity to experience and acknowledge the Holy Ghost working in the hearts of our children, helping to build their faith.
President Monson’s talk to the priesthood brethren in October 2016 is titled, “Principles and Promises”. In it he teaches us that, “Those who are obedient to the Lord’s commandments and who faithfully observe the Word of Wisdom are promised particular blessings, among which are good health and added physical stamina.
The Word of Wisdom is another important gospel principle which, if followed, brings specific promised blessings.
After completing my master’s degree at BYU, I pursued post-graduate studies at the AIMS Institute in Graz, Austria. The AIMS program is an intensive opera program designed for both education and performance. Singers who attend, train with professional opera singers and coaches to refine language and performance skills. Singers also perform throughout Austria in a series of concerts and productions.
While there I performed several pieces with a group of 5 other singers. We became friends and enjoyed rehearsing and performing together. None of the other singers in my ensemble were LDS. Following performances, it was customary to go to a bar and get drinks together. After each performance, I would be invited to join the group at the bar. Each time I declined and headed back to my room alone.
 One evening toward the end of our performance schedule, the group, myself included, had just arrived home from a concert. We were standing just outside our dorms on a perfect Austrian evening. It was summertime at dusk, not too hot, not too cold, and the smell of flowers permeated the air. We had just finished a successful performance. Everyone was feeling great and having a wonderful time together. My friends were talking about heading to the pub for drinks and I once again turned to go back to my room. One of the men in the group said, “Seriously, Rachel, just come with us. It’s no big deal!” And that comment opened the floodgates for the rest of the group. “Yes, you don’t even have to get a drink, just come, or just get some wine, that doesn’t even really count as alcohol.”
After weeks away from my husband and my home, often feeling lonely and tired of sitting alone in my dorm, it was SO tempting to go with them. I actually did consider it. “I don’t HAVE to drink and I certainly wouldn’t” I told myself. Going with my friends sounded like fun. But there was something inside of me, that still small voice that sounded an alarm in my head. I knew it wasn’t where I ought to be. So, in spite of all the persuading, I turned my back and walked away.
I don’t know all that happened that night and the other post-concert nights at the pub but I did hear enough by the end of the program to know that things occurred under the influence of alcohol that were wrong and caused much unneeded pain in the lives of some of the other singers, whether or not they themselves had been drinking. I might have been a little lonely those nights, but by following the Word of Wisdom I was kept physically safe and spiritually clean.
I received another gift as a result of my obedience to the principles of the word of wisdom
D & C 89 verses 18 & 19 say,
 And all saints who remember to keep and do these sayings, walking in obedience to the commandments, shall receive health in their navel and marrow to their bones;
 19 And shall find wisdom and great treasures of knowledge, even hidden treasures;

As a result of obedience to these principles, I received promised wisdom. Before attending the AIMS Institute, I had been trying to determine the course of my life following graduation. The next step after grad school for most singers is to begin auditioning across the country and pursuing roles in opera houses in the US and abroad.

I had always loved to perform and had wondered if that could be the next step for me. Of course, that path makes family life extremely difficult. But, prior to Austria, it seemed like an enticing path.

However, though my musical experiences in Austria were extremely positive, upon returning home I had a clarity of mind, a realization and a spiritual confirmation that performance on that level was not the path for me. I truly believe that it was a direct result of obeying the word of wisdom and listening to the promptings of the Holy Ghost that allowed me that clarity and peace. That wisdom given to those who keep the word of wisdom.

It was less than a year later that McKay our first child was born and I began to realize the no thrill of performance could begin to match the wonder and joy of being a mother in Zion. Holding McKay and Benson and Lily and Kate in my arms, watching them learn and grow, sharing the gospel with them and loving them each day has been the joy of my life.

I testify through my own personal experience that I know that when we receive any blessing from God, it is by obedience to that law upon which it is predicated.


As President Monson taught, when we obey the Lord’s commandments, we are given specific, promised blessings. My life has been blessed innumerable times as I have tried to keep the commandments and felt the blessings and tender mercies of the Lord in my life. I know this is true and bear testimony of it in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Kate and the wig

A few nights ago Riverside Elementary hosted a Star Wars themed Literacy Night where families were invited to come to the school for activities involving reading. The faculty dressed up in Star Wars costumes; the Principal was Chewbacca!



Students were invited to dress up too. It was sort of a Halloween reboot with Benson wearing his Po starfighter costume. McKay's take on the theme was wrapping up in a brown towel and putting green socks on his ears. It was amazing how many people realized that he was Yoda. Lily, heard the words "dress up" and wasted no time whipping out her Ariel Halloween costume, red wig and all! She paraded through the school proudly, blissfully mistaking people's wide smiles at her as congratulations on the perfect costume choice.

After about half an hour of wearing the long red Ariel wig, Lily got sick of it and handed it to me. A few minutes later I felt the wig being tugged from my hand. There was little Kate, pulling on the wig until she had it. She then plopped it squarely on top of her head, backwards. The long red tresses completely covered her face and torso but she didn't care. When I tried to fix it she screamed and batted my hands away, so I let her be. She spend a solid 25 minutes walking through the school halls looking like a red-haired Cousin It. She kept bumping into things and people but only got upset when the wig fell off.

McKay's Weekly Response

February 6,2017

McKay D Cox

MANY A BAD BEGINNING GREAT FRIENDSHIPS HAVE SPRUNG UP
  • Terence 185-159 B.C

      This phrase means this to me…
That if you have a very well known friend that is like a brother or sister you were not always
  best friends you might have been enemies. When I was six I hated this one kid, but now we are
good friends . For example my mom didn’t like my dad she thought he was weird because he wore an unusual bunch of clothes which were black and white striped overalls and a train
 Conductors hat with the same design as the overalls but now they live with each other!
    And that is the end!  [remember smile !]